I'm always attracted to men who don't want me! What can I do?Sun, Nov 16th 2008
I'm a 49 year old man. I think and feel like I'm from another time, another planet. Most people instantly like me. I've been blessed with many amazing friends over the years and yet, never really had anyone to hold nor anyone to hold me. I'm clinically disappointed. My life now holds more regrets than dreams.
I'm gay. There's obviously something wrong with my tastes when it comes to men. I've been exclusively attracted to young men for as long as I can remember. When I was in my twenties, I was attracted to men in their twenties. When I was in my thirties, I was only attracted to men in their twenties. They were rarely attracted to me. Now, in my forties (soon to be fifty), I find myself still exclusively attracted to young men. Young men are not interested in me. In Los Angeles, the gay culture puts you out to pasture if you're over thirty. I'm reasonably good looking, outgoing, kind, gentle, with a great sense of humor, to young men, I am invisible. This is understandable, but how does one change what one is attracted to?
There's more than my ageism that frustrates me. I appreciate effeminate men, however, they do nothing for me sexually. There's also the current trend in gay culture that is a complete turn-off for me —a seemingly majority of guys removing all their body hair. I find chest hair and pubic hair very sexy. To my eyes, a hairless handsome dude just looks like an overgrown twelve-year old. The only hairy men left are either straight or generally obese 'bears'. These are my 'tastes' and I'm sincerely not trying to be a snob. With my warped perspective, I'm doomed to never even begin to develop a relationship. The fashionable hairlessness movement can be tolerated cuz hair has the chance of growing back. But with my age prejudice, I'm f**ked cuz I can never grow young. I'm stuck in a hopeless dead end. Is there any hope for me and my conundrum(s)?
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